“Letting the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back” – Will Rogers
Oklahoma is burlap-sacks full of entertainers who make history, both past and present. So when my tax guy (Crotts and Assoc.) said he would give me a break on my filing fees if I made him a catification that didn’t give him and his clients more anxiety, I knew just who would be next on my list – Brad Pitt. Who I would have gladly catified, except every time I try it ends up looking like Paul Reubens, so I went with the next best Okie, Will Rogers. You might all remember him from the airport. I chose his iconic pose with his wrangling rope because I like to imagine Will Rogers the zombie coming back as a half cat, half man ready to rope and can all the legislative alley cats that are making a discrimination-free day and living harder to come by for the fine people here in Oklahoma – but with a wry smile and a quip that would make Senator Lankpurr show emails.
I’d also like to announce the first Boo Science Tshirt, a Mary Howlin retro and very patriotic design. Buy it soon, or you clearly hate Oklahoma, God, and the sanctity of your wardrobe.
As for the other cats, you know how Anchors are, you catify one for doing a tremendous interview (thanks Morgan Chesky!) and they all want to be creeped out by seeing themselves as an anthropomorphized cat. Buncha weirdos, but we love them.
I have a buddy (hey Kade!) down south who graduated with a “Bach in Government”, from The Cats Meow in the French Quarter, I presume, which I think means he knows a lot about the classical music played in Federal building elevators. He told me I might want to take a look at Mississippi’s Mexico (aside from actual Mexico) for some Senatorial cat inspiration. Well it it turns out Kade was right, which is shocking, because I’ve lived in Louisiana and it usually takes a few beers before anyone I knew down there would tell you anything but a joke about boobs, their politicians, or Mississippi. That must mean things are serious down there, or their politicians look exactly like cats. I’ll let you decide, but stay on the lookout, aside from catifying their hooked loving (Sen David Vitter), and evangelical (Sen Bill Cassidy – in this case for his state’s environmental recovery funding) senators I’ll be looking at a few other Mush-mouthed candidates. I’m looking at you, Governor Bobbikins Jangles.
Also, please enjoy a pothole as a politician, mostly because we have horrible pothole problems here in the Oklahoma City metro area, but also because I find the visual of Oklahoma’s most something something Senator, James Lankford, happily snarking from a 5 foot deep water-filled pothole freaking hilarious.
Recently I catified Oklahoma’s 44th District Representative Emily Virgin, thanks to her work for the LGBT and various minority communities. To my complete pleasure and surprise Rep Virgin happened to be in a twitter conversation with Perez Hilton about the recent legislative events, and Perez catsually “begged to differ” that his Twitter mention was more important than my catification of Oklahoma’s most adored LGBT hero. It seems to me Perez is just jealous, and I aim to fix that. Perez, be catty no more. We all love you here in Oklahoma, plenty of tummy rubs await your visit to our complex, but beautiful state. You’re purrfect how you are and we would love your company as soon as possible.
As for the Shat cat, who wouldn’t love to see out favorite redditor and social kitty, Mr. Catner, in fur form, I’m just shocked we didn’t see him contract some feline STD during the early Star Trek series shots among all those purrmiscuous cat-like aliens during his travels in the expansive cardboard box in which we all live. Respect to the Shat.
Norman, Oklahoma’s District 44 badass Representative Emily Virgin saved Oklahoma from a lot of legal trouble, embarrassment, and bankruptcy thanks to an ammendment to an ammendment to the Religious Freedom Act of Oklahoma. The piece in question was an ammendment that would potentially allow discrimination against gay and lesbian patrons in Oklahoma, among other minority groups. Representative Virgin simply added a few small details requiring businesses to post in public, everywhere, the exact brand of bigotry that business puts in practice. BRAVO. That is seriously the best play against hate I have ever witnessed in the Oklahoma legislature. Me and all the furry employees at Boo Science hope to see that type of leadership claw it’s way all the way to the top. I’ve got a ladder if anyone gets stuck, but I doubt Virgin will need help navigating the heights of future politics, wherever it takes her.
Second, below are a few “catification”, where people have donated whatever they feel appropriate, then I catify them and donate 10% to the Oklahoma Medical Research Foundation. These are local Okies, who I’ve found make gorgeous cats, so it’s a pleasure to bring you my renditions of people who like cartoon cats for some reason.
Lastly, I doodle a lot. Sometimes it’s about things that largely and specifically only apply to me. I apologize in advance for all future comics that have this quality. The Anatomy of Manspreading comic below is one of those. And for the record, I don’t manspread in public, you fellow lads shouldn’t either, and ladies, keep the purses off empty seats.
People have been asking to be catified, which is totally weird, but cats are SUPER weird, so it seems fitting. I’m not sure how to structure the cost, other than charging a decent flat hourly rate for (usually) 2 hours worth of stylus work, so until further notice my digital catifications will be on a per donation basis. If you want a print or a painting the cost will depend of the subject and time/materials requires, and priced accordingly. Simply message me (email@example.com) and we can get started. 10% of donations will go to OMRF.ORG (Oklahoma Medical Research Foundation), a very reputable research facility that deals with, among other things, alzheimers and heart disease. I will be offering more choices in the near future for your donated monies. Stay tuned.
As for today’s cats, Don Young just garnered catification due to media attention on his idea to solve Alaska’s homelessness problem with wolves. Yes, really. Oklahoma’s 32nd was drawn due to his bassadness, baseball skills, and willingness to serve Oklahoma during its fight for anything but baseball or kids (not Randy’s fault, thus far). If you want to read about an Okie truly huge in Japan, go read about Representative Randy Bass, he is in the Japanese Tiger’s top 5 all time players, and still holds the highest recorded Japanese batting average, a respectable .389, nothing to shake a stick at.
If you have any suggestions for catification donation monies, contact me, I’ll do the research and offer more as I find the good ones.
A request to catify NYC Mayoral Candidate John Catsimatidis was delivered byKatie Honanover at DNAinfo. After reading up on the Greek billionaire, seeing his face, and then imagining what a billionaire would do with a tabloid newspaper if he bought it right after he lost an election amused me so much I had to draw him. I think it turned out pretty swank.
That accounts for Catsimatidis, which happens to be the only politician so far that didn’t need his or her name catified, and there’s an excellent reason for Senator Barbara Mewkulski, that I’ll get to in a moment, but what about the young Danish political socialite in a dinner setting? Well, I woke up this morning and reddit was briefly alarming some obscure conservative trend setter in Denmark, and then posting a copious volume of her self published scantily clad modeling photos (among plenty of professional and official portraits) along with a furious smattering of half way translated interview responses, profile information and links to her policies. I figured she was so instantly admired for her progressive conservative politics by a traditionally left leaning demographic that she might just be onto something new with her youthful ideas, her perhaps original platforms. Maybe she will get famous, hit a talk circuit and rub off on some of the politicians around here. I’m sure someone out there would love to see Senator Lankford in his most comfy oversized sweater talking about the definition of marriage.
And finally, but most importantly, I was just doing my usual Google search for senator cat jokes and a story came across about Maryland Senator Barbara Mikulski has announced she will not be seeking reelection in 2016, effectively retiring as the longest running woman to serve in Congress. Take the time to read over some of her achievements, she has kicked open the doors of progress for women and men alike, doing all sorts of things like making it legal for women Senators to wear pants (no joke), course correcting the federal spending during several crises, all while basically adopting every stray female Senator that ever made her way to the floor. She is highly respected and I’m sad I didn’t know who she was sooner. Hopefully she achieves her final goals, one of which is to achieve equal pay for women. Seriously, read up on her, she’s a badass who made this a better country with her service.
Since I started drawing politicians as cats a few weeks ago I’ve received a few requests. These are a few, some others were US Senators that will be done this week, but I’d like to keep the names a secret until they’re done. It’s more fun that way. Til then I had a blast learning about de Blasio (cat named by @HowardHalle of timeout.com) and his incredibly confusing career as Mayor in New York. I found an ancient photo of the guy from the old college days, or perhaps volunteering at a wig making factory, it’s hard to tell because of the lack of pixels. I do know I have had a fro myself and I know how difficult maintaining such great heights on helmet prone hair can be, so the photo I needed to work from was obvious.
Assemblywoman Michele Fiore (Nevada R) believes humans are a fungus and we should stop spending so much money on expensive treatment and just flush each other occasionally with salt water. There’s just nothing I can saw about that without sobbing mathematically, so I won’t.
As far as Dorman goes, we just really like him around here, despite his recent troubling lack of participation in all Oklahoma things that are political. I miss a groomed orange beard telling us what the kids need but definitely won’t get. I hope we see him again very soon. Until then, let me know below who you want catified. I just might include it in the next request fulfillment.