A robot named HitchBOT has been making his way through Europe, Canada, and recently started his American journey, when shortly into this apparently ludicrous idea for an unaccompanied autonomous hitchhiking machine he met his demise in Philadelphia. To be fair to UberX and their drivers it is not known how HitchBOT actually met his demise roadside, but after googling tourist problems in Philly I found there was a claim of an UberX driver attacking, raping, and holding hostage a woman that went to court, and it doesn’t appear to be the only such claim again Uber. Let’s hope this time it was simply a newer version of HitchBOT from the future that came back in time using cocaine, John Swifts underpants, riding the Liberty Bell at 88 mph during a thunderstorm while holding a pitchfork so he could harvest the needed parts to correct the time line to one where Donald Trump hadn’t been elected President for a third term.
Here’s to hoping. Also here’s a bit more about the demise of HitchBOT –
“Letting the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back” – Will Rogers
Oklahoma is burlap-sacks full of entertainers who make history, both past and present. So when my tax guy (Crotts and Assoc.) said he would give me a break on my filing fees if I made him a catification that didn’t give him and his clients more anxiety, I knew just who would be next on my list – Brad Pitt. Who I would have gladly catified, except every time I try it ends up looking like Paul Reubens, so I went with the next best Okie, Will Rogers. You might all remember him from the airport. I chose his iconic pose with his wrangling rope because I like to imagine Will Rogers the zombie coming back as a half cat, half man ready to rope and can all the legislative alley cats that are making a discrimination-free day and living harder to come by for the fine people here in Oklahoma – but with a wry smile and a quip that would make Senator Lankpurr show emails.
I’d also like to announce the first Boo Science Tshirt, a Mary Howlin retro and very patriotic design. Buy it soon, or you clearly hate Oklahoma, God, and the sanctity of your wardrobe.
As for the other cats, you know how Anchors are, you catify one for doing a tremendous interview (thanks Morgan Chesky!) and they all want to be creeped out by seeing themselves as an anthropomorphized cat. Buncha weirdos, but we love them.
I painted this for my sweet teaching gig at Wine & Palette, here in Okc. I definitely absorbed as much Van Gough as I could when I was an avid oil painter in my twenties, but I feel like that cat represents my inner foodie, the selfish part that wants a perfect burger to exist in Okc, but instead finds himself dressed up in a fish suit, again, forced to eat Fancy Feast or ice cream shared off the spoon of a crying, lonely middle aged woman in pajamas. Not that there’s anything wrong with pajamas, ice cream, or middle aged women without cats. I guess I’m just saying that neither should involve a fish suit. Or don’t trust a fish burger. Whichever means more to you. Just please, someone in Oklahoma City metro make a burger that doesn’t taste like a crazy cat lady made it.
See this face? This is the face of a man purposefully trying to recreate the 80’s movie Karate Kid signature crane kick stance on a paddle board in a creek. So I’d like to take this time to thank all anyone who had to look at this face for whatever reason or reasons in the past, and my amazing girlfriend Jennifer. You didn’t have to stick through something like that, and yet you did. I was considering uploading videos of me working on jewelry, painting, talking about my craft and the crazy internet articles or cat pics I ran across that day, but after seeing that face, well, I won’t punish the Internet for my and nature’s misdeeds.
Maybe I can start a Bob Ross style painting podcast.
I just thought everyone should know Emily Sutton wears Boo Science jewelry. Which is awesome, she’s our favorite weather person of all time.
My Jae bae has her b-day today, so I spent the week painting her other boyfriend in toxic pigments, that way she knows I’m willing to slowly kill myself for her even when she’s away. She loved it, and who wouldn’t love a portrait of yet another Oklahoma based hipster with a likely laziness inspired beard?